The Third Stage of Sensate Focus
In the next phase of sensate focus, instead of taking turns touching each other, the couple is asked to try some mutual touching. The purpose of this exercise is to practice a more natural or real life form of physical interaction (people don't usually take turns touching and being touched), and to help each partner shift attention to a portion of his or her partner's body and away from watching his or her own response. Couples are reminded that no matter how sexually aroused they feel, intercourse is still off limits.

Subsequent Stages of Sensate Focus
The next stages of sensate focus are to continue with the mutual touching, then at some point to move into the female-on-top position without attempting insertion of the penis into the vagina.

In this position, the woman can rub the penis against her clitoral region, vulva and vaginal opening regardless of whether or not there is an erection.

In a subsequent session, she may progress to putting the tip of the penis into the vagina if there is an erection, all the while focusing on the physical sensations and stopping or moving back to non-genital touching if either partner becomes orgasm oriented or anxious.

After completing a session or two at this level, couples are usually comfortable enough to proceed to full intercourse without difficulty. These fairly simple techniques are used as part of a comprehensive program of psychotherapy and can have a dramatic effect, even in cases where severe sexual dysfunction has been present for many years.

Professionals generally agree that there are various dynamics to account for the profound effects of these seemingly simple exercises. For one, sensate focus exercises are a form of invivo desensitization whereby a feared situation is gradually mastered by breaking it into discrete steps that are experienced under safe conditions.

Sensate Focus — A Freeing Experience
Furthermore, the explicit instruction against sexual arousal and orgasm frees each partner of the pressure to produce an adequate sexual response in him- or her- self or in his or her partner.

It is also important that they are given permission to experience pleasure. Thus, sensate focus is a learning experience whereby pleasurable responses are reinforced and sexual anxiety is diminished because the fear of failure is removed.

An additional therapeutic feature of sensate focus relates to the psychodynamics of the couple's psychosexual problems. Masters and Johnson, along with renowned sex therapist Helen Singer Kaplan, noted that in gently caressing each other, the couple may be confronted with one or both partners' anxiety about physical intimacy.

Both the anxiety that is aroused and the defenses this anxiety elicits become important avenues for psychotherapeutic exploration, and can be very important in understanding and improving a couple's relationship in general, which most likely will have a significant influence on their sexual functioning.

Copyright 2002 Sinclair Intimacy Institute