Common Concerns About Fellatio
Even if a couple includes fellatio in their sexual relationship, anxieties about performing fellatio on a man may still exist. The person performing fellatio may have concerns that the partner's penis may be too large for her or his mouth or that it may cause gagging. Another common worry is that the man will urinate during fellatio, or if ejaculation occurs, that the taste or feel of semen in the mouth will be unpleasant.

Although an erect penis may be too large to fit entirely in one's mouth, some form of mouth contact can usually be made on the penis regardless of size. How deep into the mouth a penis penetrates can be controlled by either the man or his partner placing their hand around the shaft of the penis. This technique allows the hand to act as a stopper to control the depth the penis enters the mouth, thereby reducing the risk of gagging due to deep penetration. A thick penis that may stretch the lips and mouth can be licked up and down the shaft and around the glans without trying to take the penis fully into the mouth.

With regard to urinating during fellatio, it is extremely unlikely that any man is going to urinate in his partner's mouth by accident. Men cannot ejaculate and urinate at the same time. During ejaculation there is a reflex action that contracts a muscle in the neck of the bladder which leads to the penis preventing the flow of urine.

If a person giving fellatio is hesitant to have the man ejaculate into her or his mouth, the partner can signal when he is about to ejaculate and his penis can be removed from the mouth. For some, the slightly salty and chlorine-like taste of semen (which can intermingle with certain tastes from a partner's recent meal) can create an unpleasant taste; others may find this unique taste part of the erotic experience of lovemaking.

If couples feel comfortable incorporating fellatio into their sexual relationship, communication about their concerns and preferences, along with experimentation with different techniques can allow for a pleasurable experience for both partners.

Those who feel uncertain about how to perform fellatio or wish to learn more about this topic may want to consult "The Joy of Sex" and "More Joy of Sex" books by Alex Comfort or "The Ultimate Sex Book" by Ann Hooper.

Copyright 2002 Sinclair Intimacy Institute