Multiple Relationships Not Uncommon in Bisexuals
In other cases, a bisexual person may have simultaneous relationships with a man and a woman. Affairs during a lasting relationship may also be used to express one's bisexual orientation. Most often, whichever of these patterns applies, people with bisexual orientation have a tendency toward more relationships with one gender than the other.

Researchers who have studied female bisexuality note that some women who identify themselves as bisexual say that they have some emotional needs that are best met by men and others that are best met by women. Some bisexual men offered this explanation too, but much more often the male bisexual explains his sexual lifestyle in terms of a need for variety and creativity.

People usually discover their bisexual orientation later in life than either heterosexuals or homosexuals. The majorities of people model the heterosexual lifestyle and drift into bisexual relationships without consciously thinking about it initially.

Most people who discover their attraction to the same sex try to deny their interest and attempt to fit in with the more socially acceptable heterosexual lifestyle for a while. Usually by adolescence there is increasing internal conflict about their sexual preference that may not be fully resolved until adulthood.

Because it is commonly thought that people are either heterosexual or homosexual, even by people with bisexual interests, these people seem to struggle for a longer period of time trying to conform to one lifestyle or the other.

It is common for people to be well into their 20s or 30s before accepting their bisexual orientation. Society's definitions of what is normal, appropriate, right and natural have an enormous influence on how bisexual people feel about their sexual orientation.

Alienation Common Among Bisexuals
Given the negative bias toward bisexuality, it is not unusual for women and men with a bisexual orientation to feel alienated from and oppressed by both the heterosexual and homosexual communities. For them, this can raise serious questions about their sexual identity. Bisexual people have problems similar to those that homosexual people have in "coming out" and making their orientation known to family and friends.

Someone who is bisexual may often find it harder to start and maintain relationships than people of heterosexual or homosexual orientation. Because bisexual people are both different and often misunderstood, those who do not have a bisexual orientation may be rejecting or feel that a relationship with a bisexual person could not be valid or rewarding.

Jealousy, which can be a problem in any relationship, is particularly likely in a relationship in which one partner is bisexual. If both partners are bisexual the possibilities for jealousy may be even greater. The threat of such widespread competition can be very stressful to a couple that is not secure in their relationship.

There is much more to be learned about the nature of bisexuality and perhaps as bisexual people become more accepted in society, scientific studies will contribute new information.

Copyright 2002 Sinclair Intimacy Institute